Bee's Hive

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

September 18th

Tomorrow I will be having a biopsy for possible cancer. My thoughts can only go to my son who lost his life at age 27 on this day. Cancer seems so small when I got to see the sun, rain & life while his life was snuffed out so early. I miss you Mark, your funny jokes, your smile, your compassion for others. If it's God's will I know you will be waiting for me to lead me home. I love you....Ma

The first year I went to the grave several times a week. There was no marker on the grave. I made a wooden white cross with his birthday and date of death. People visit the cemetery on Sunday's and walk around looking at the headstones. Three times that first year I was asked if he died from outraged me to think his age would allow people to put him in the druggy category. When I ordered the stone I was angry and wanted it to yell out that his life was snuffed out and not by DRUGS. I'm still not sorry. When I'm gone and forever no one will use his age as a drug death. I still feel like screaming, "People do die for other reasons, even if they are young".


Rhonda said...

Oh Bea. My prayers and warm thoughts are winging their way to you.
I can see and feel that your heart is broken. I can say that I know of some of what you're going through when it comes to a loved one dying young and people assuming things. My brother died at age 32 from a life long illness and mom and I miss him everyday.
My you gather a small amount of peace in knowing that I care, my friend.

shawkl said...

What a sad week for you Bea, hoping that all goes well tomorrow.

Looking at Mark's photo...I can see Dave in that face too. And you can just see the joy and kindness radiating from those eyes.

Hugs my friend.